In Part 1 we talk about ‘normal’ levels of conflict. Let’s Talk About Conflict is a seven-part video series, each 5–10 minutes duration, supportive learnings and takeaways.
Conflict can be Repaired
Parental conflict can range from constructive to destructive, to domestic violence in its most extreme form. Fortunately, normal levels of conflict are manageable and even give children chances to learn and grow, provided everyone remains safe. Much long-term harm to your child is preventable, and damage from many forms of conflict can be repaired.
Children Need Emotional Support to Thrive
Just as plants need soil to grow, your child needs emotional nourishment from you for their emotional and social development. As a parent, you are like a gardener. You and the relationships you create around your child become the soil your child grows in.
Low level conflict between parents is a normal part of family life. While it can include accommodating behaviours (such as staying calm, and seeing the other parent’s point of view), there are times when it becomes destructive. Being around destructive conflict between parents (such as anger, distrust, threats, shouting, or the ‘silent treatment’) is like a toxin or bad soil. You might not see the damage at first, but emotional toxins can have a negative impact on your child’s long-term mental health and future life chances.
Importantly, most parents can make small changes that make big differences to your child’s life, allowing them to thrive and flourish.
Reflections
Consider how you respond to your partner or former partner when you are in a verbal disagreement, that’s unpleasant but not unsafe. Do you recognise unhelpful behaviours in yourself? If you do, there is something you can do about it, beginning with communicating differently.
Watch the Full Series
The series is designed for use by parents, whether they live together or are separated. It is a practical tool to support them to reduce the impact of their conflict on their children’s emotional and social development.
Based on more than 20 years of scientific research and practice evidence, it features ideas and tips from experts that are direct and to-the-point. The series also highlights the real experiences of parents who have made real-life challenges related to the conflict in their family. To explore how parental relationships affect children, what the full series:
- Introduction: Let’s Talk About Conflict
- Part 1: What is ‘parental conflict’, and why should we talk about it?
- Part 2: What your parents did not know
- Part 3: How does parental conflict impact on child development?
- Part 4: How do children adapt to parental conflict?
- Part 5: How can parents manage parental conflict?
- Part 6: How can parents help repair damage from parental conflict?
Please note that Relationships Australia SA does not offer a certificate or verification of completion for these videos.
Acknowledgments
Let’s Talk About Conflict © was written by Jennifer E. McIntosh and Craig Olsson from the Centre for Social and Early Emotional Development (SEED), Deakin University. It was produced by Relationships Australia SA.
If you feel like you need extra support Relationships Australia SA also offers a range of services for families and children and youth that can help. Together4Kids provides therapeutic support to children aged 0–12 to help them: overcome trauma, strengthen children’s ability to deal with difficult feelings and reactions, and adjust to family changes and disruptions. Get in touch with us today.
English 
Arabic 
Chinese (China) 
Chinese (Hong Kong) 
Greek 
Italian 
Korean 
Panjabi 
Serbian 
Thai 
Vietnamese 
Facebook
Twitter
Linkedin
Email